Deprecated: Assigning the return value of new by reference is deprecated in /home/cather20/public_html/blog/wp-includes/cache.php on line 36

Deprecated: Assigning the return value of new by reference is deprecated in /home/cather20/public_html/blog/wp-includes/query.php on line 21

Deprecated: Assigning the return value of new by reference is deprecated in /home/cather20/public_html/blog/wp-includes/theme.php on line 540
l’azile » déjà vu and yet not so much

October 13, 2009

déjà vu and yet not so much

catherine @ 3:47 pm

I am very tired. To the point that I have had trouble keeping my eyes open these last few days and would I listen to myself, I would just nap all day long. Most evenings, all I feel like doing is calling it a night at 7 PM. People who know me understand that this is completely out of character for me.

I think part of it is obviously the fact that I am still healing, my body is still working on things and it indeed has a lot of stuff to take care of. And of course, I am also dealing with a lot of stress. Not to mention low blood pressure which is something new. The other part of it is, I think, that I have not smoked a cigarette since the accident (which is hardly surprising, what with being unable to move much for the first week or so, let alone get out of bed and go outside to have a smoke). Every time I have tried to quit smoking, it has had a similar effect on me, i.e. being tired and practically stoned, although never quite so intense.

So I have decided to try to stick with it. I do not know if I will succeed because although the physical withdrawal is pretty much over, it really is the psychological withdrawal that is the hardest and the longest to deal with. But I am going to try because I have been hoping to quit smoking for a good while and, ironically, this seems like the perfect opportunity.

Anyway, I was transferred from Jean-Talon Hospital to the Montreal Rehab Institute last Monday as planned. I will forgo the details on how that transfer was almost handled except to say that the hospital’s idiot social worker continued to be the biggest asshole up to the very end. I guess there are things that you really can count on. But, since I consider this guy to be a menace to society, I will be filing an official complaint. He will rue the day he decided to screw with me and he will learn to do his job properly.

Since arriving here, things have been pretty low-key. I spent the first three days in isolation until the rehab center could determine I had not brought along some super-bug from the hospital. While in isolation, I stayed in what some patients call the VIP room. After getting the all clear on Wednesday night, they started out by transferring me to a room that I would have had to share with a guy (not to mention having to share the bathroom with three guys). That proved too much for me, I just could not imagine dealing with that in my mental state. So I asked to be transferred to a room with a woman and they finally relented.

Turns out though this woman hardly ever sleeps and when she does, snores like a bear. She also spends an insane amount of time yapping on the phone and hours sending text messages on her cell phone, even in the middle of the night (often with the volume on so it is “beep, beep, beep, beep”…). Luckily, she goes home on weekends, which affords me three nights of decent sleep. And apparently, she will be released in a couple of weeks (which will not be soon enough as far as I am concerned). She also has made it quite clear that she is resentful of the fact that I succeeded in getting a room with a woman where others (namely her) have failed. You know, when people tell you things like “I don’t resent you per se (…)”, they actually do. That is like saying “I have nothing against gay people but…”. Anyway, this girl obviously has a lot of problems and I do not want any trouble. But I do want sleep so we are going to have to come to some kind of arrangement or else this is not going to work.

Thursday, I had my first weekly meeting with my team of professionals (doctor, physiotherapist, occupational therapist, prosthetist, psychologist, social worker, nurse) to determine what the short-term game plan is. Which for now is talking to the orthopedist who operated to get some answers (since the hospital did such a crappy job of documenting my case) and having me seen by a specialist to determine what, if anything, is causing my hip and thigh bone to break so easily. Until we get those answers, physiotherapy will be mild and I will not be putting any weight on my leg (contrarily to the ortho’s initial recommendations). I will be seeing the ortho this coming Friday and I hope to gawd the news will be good and I can start complete rehab immediately afterwards.

The neuro-psychologist they appointed to me wants me to put off working for a little while as he feels I already have a lot to deal with. I have had a few friends visit, namely Pierrot who took me out last Friday for a belated birthday lunch during which I even allowed myself to drink a bit of wine. I also had my first post-op x-rays Friday. I have to say they were kind of alarming but I will wait to see the ortho before drawing any conclusions.

And, despite the coldish weather, I have been trying to spend as much time as possible in Lindsey garden, one of my favorite places and surely one of the main reasons I did not lose my mind the first time I broke my hip. Although I doubt it will help as much this time around. Because the truth is, I am still in shock and rather depressed about this whole situation. I just want all this to be over as soon as possible. I just want to go home.

No Comments »

No comments yet.

RSS feed for comments on this post.

Leave a comment

XHTML (You can use these tags): <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <code> <em> <i> <strike> <strong> .

Please note that first-time comments will be held in moderation. For more information, see moderation policy.


link rel=